PART B
Three key principles for me about forgiving others are:
1) Knowing that Jesus, the sinless Lamb of God, paid for my offenses against God,* motivates me, a sinner saved by grace, to forgive others as He forgives me. How can I not?
2) Remembering my own ongoing need for God’s grace and forgiveness helps me extend the same toward others.
3) The “Vengeance is mine, I will repay,” and the overall message of Romans 12:14-21, has empowered me to release some pretty heavy stuff to Him and trust Him to take care of it. He will “settle the score” and that’s a big deal to me! I have even found myself pleading for mercy for those who sinned against me.
Forgiveness is more apt to take the sting out of a memory than to erase it. And yes, we may need to set boundaries for someone in the process; broken trust or betrayal take time to heal; and we may need to remove ourselves from a certain situation at least for a while, but it is important that we actively work at it with Jesus our Healer. The one who forgives can be free regardless of the actions/attitudes of the offender.
Bottom line, unforgiveness is a doorway into darkness and forgiveness a doorway into light. We have a choice, and it is at great peril to ourselves in this life and maybe for eternity (Matthew 6:14-15), to ignore this non-negotiable of Jesus. Or isn’t it really all that serious?
UNOFFENDABLE
A spirit of forgiveness is essential to healthy relationships in general, and especially to a good marriage. Even better, is to extend grace and give each other room to be imperfect in a way that prevents another’s action from becoming an offense that requires forgiveness. Proverbs 19:11 says, “Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.” ESV Nobody but Jesus ever did that better than my Elaine did.
It is our personal insecurities that make us vulnerable to quickly taking offense, and the more secure we are in our identity in Christ the less vulnerable we are to others. That identity deepens as we grow in Christlike humility and love, and fewer and fewer events will have the capacity to cause offense.
It’s a good way to live. Try it!
*I Peter 2:24
Ken Stoltzfus
Kidron, Ohio USA
April 15, 2026
PDF at: www.10minas.net/wp-content/uploads/2026/04/26-14.pdf